Tag: Faith in Everyday Life

‘Backyard Baseball’ and the Saints: Building Teams That Help Us Grow
Photo by nytumbleweeds on Bigstock

Pablo Sanchez, Pete Wheeler, Luanne Lui . . . Do these names strike any memories? If so, you may have invested more hours than you can count playing “Backyard Baseball” in the late ’90s and early 2000s. Perhaps you learned about “Backyard Baseball” recently, when fans of the original PC/Mac computer game launched an online server mimicking the features of the discontinued classic back in 2021.

Whether I had just come home from school or had been stuck inside during a snowstorm, I loved assembling a fictional team of neighborhood kids to play baseball in varying environments, such as Sandy Flats and Tin Can City — Playground Commons was my first choice. My favorite part was testing the unique cast of characters in different groups to create the most advantageous team. I laughed hard at their punchlines — “Slick, you made the right decision!” — and I admired their headstrong eagerness to help me, the player, win the game.

Recently, the cast of “Backyard Baseball” reminded me of another group of like-minded individuals who work together for the same purpose — the saints!

RELATED: What Are the Benefits of Praying to Saints?

Choosing a saint to pray to is a lot like choosing a player to join my team on “Backyard Baseball.” Once I select a team name, the characters all line up on the bleachers, eager to be picked — some even waving to get my attention. When I click on a player to learn more, I hear their pitch to join my team and see their skill ratings, which show the areas where they excel and falter. This is not much different from looking at the communion of saints and praying to one who catches my eye!

When looking to recruit players for batting, I may consider Achmed Khan, a strong hitter, or Vicki Kawaguchi, a fast runner. Similarly, when I need guidance in specific areas of my life, I think of certain saints right away — St. Joseph when I’m considering a career change or St. Maria Goretti when I’m pursuing a romantic relationship.

If I check out the rest of Khan’s stats, though, I’ll see he’s not the best pitcher. In fact, his skill rating is so low, I wonder if he’s ever thrown a ball straight in his life. Likewise, the saints, while living on earth, had their challenges. Although St. Therese of Lisieux had a strong prayer life, she struggled with mental health.

RELATED: How Video Games Helped Me Level Up My Faith

However, St. Paul advised in his second letter to the Corinthians that God’s grace “is made perfect in weakness” (12:9), meaning that God gives us more help and guidance to be like him and the saints because of our weaknesses. Much like a player from “Backyard Baseball,” the saints contribute to my team. When I fear that my anxiety and depression are clouding my mind and the voice of God, I pray to St. Therese for guidance, because she made it to heaven despite these obstacles.

Some characters like Sally Dobbs and Stephanie Morgan are evenly skilled across the scoreboard, not particularly talented in one specific area but reliable when placed in any position on the field. These characters remind me most of saints like St. Anthony of Padua, St. Paul, and St. Francis of Assisi, who are the patron saints of many areas. Many know St. Anthony as the patron saint of lost items, but he also guides me in improving ministries at my parish — he’s the patron of my local church!

No matter who’s on my baseball team, all these characters care about is winning the game for me, the player, just like the saints root for me to win salvation. In real life, our souls are at stake, and the saints so eagerly want to extend grace from God so that we can achieve eternal life.

We’re still on earth, and the saints are in Heaven in full communion with God. So why not ask for their help?

In case you’re wondering, here are the saints on my team!
- Maria Goretti — chastity and forgiveness
- Francis de Sales — writing
- Mother Cabrini — courage
- Pope John Paul II — evangelization
- Anthony of Padua — parish life
- Joseph the Worker — career life
- John of the Cross — dark times/spiritual desolation
- Therese of Lisieux — humility/mental health
- Mother Teresa — conviction
August 12, 2024
Finding Christ Worldwide: Embracing the Universal Celebration of Mass

The author in front of Burgos Cathedral in Spain. (Photo courtesy of Sheila DeBoer)

Going to weekly Mass at St. Vincent de Paul – my large home parish in Washington State – was just another part of my routine growing up. I could count on sliding into a pew each Sunday with my parents and younger brother and sister, and I might even altar serve on a given weekend.

Mass was something I enjoyed, but it wasn’t something I connected to on a deeper level. To me, Mass was just what we did as a family, something very regular and earthly, like going to the grocery store or the park. I paid attention, enjoyed the music, and looked around at all those gathered, but I didn’t understand much of what was happening. Afterward, our family would head out for a meal or run errands, and the Mass we had attended would take its place as a pleasant memory.

As I entered high school, received the Sacrament of Confirmation, and began lectoring, my interest in discovering a deeper-than-surface-level understanding of the Mass began to grow. Then, when I experienced Mass in other Catholic Churches besides my home parish — a midwestern parish in North Dakota while visiting my sister, a beautiful basilica in Spain on pilgrimage, or Galway’s cathedral in Ireland on a trip with my mom all in my early 20s— I began to notice the uniqueness of liturgical worship in a new way.

RELATED: Attending Mass in a Different Language Taught Me About the Universality of the Church

I began to recognize that the Mass I was part of in my home parish each week was being celebrated universally around the world, in different languages and cultures — and the same Christ was present through the words of the priest in each act of consecration at the altar. This realization broadened my view of the Mass from something ordinary to something extraordinary.

As my appreciation for the Mass grew, I came across an even more profound reality: The Mass is a celebration where both the living and dead are in attendance. I discovered this truth only a year or two ago when listening to the Catechism in a Year podcast with Fr. Mike Schmitz. According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church in article #1354 regarding the Mass: “The Church indicates that the Eucharist is celebrated in communion with the whole Church in heaven and on earth, the living and the dead, and in communion with the pastors of the Church, the pope, the diocesan bishop, his presbyterium and his deacons, and all the bishops of the whole world together with their Churches.”

It is out-of-this-world (literally!) to realize that the Mass is more than a universal celebration across lands and peoples on earth, but that at each and every Mass, heaven literally touches earth. In the Lord’s Prayer, we ask that God’s will be “done on earth as it is in heaven,” and the Mass is a foretaste of heaven. In the book of Revelation, the apostle John has a vision of heavenly worship. He writes: “Day and night without ceasing they sing, ‘Holy, Holy, Holy, is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come.’”

It is fitting, then, that at Mass, we echo these words on earth in the Sanctus, a Latin Eucharistic prayer, or prayer of the angels, offering our praise and thanksgiving to God: “Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God of hosts, heaven and earth are full of your glory. Hosanna in the highest.” At every Mass, we are in attendance with the angels, as well as those loved ones who have gone before us — participating personally with a great cloud of heavenly witnesses singing and glorifying God.

RELATED: 7 Ways to Connect More Deeply With Sunday Mass

St. John Chrysostom, an early father of the Church, once said: “When Mass is being celebrated, the sanctuary is filled with countless angels who adore the Divine Victim [sacrificed] on the altar.” Do we consider the presence of angelic hosts with us at Mass as we remember and represent the one and only sacrifice of Christ on the cross upon the altar? Whenever I attend Mass, I enter into worship of the creator with those in heaven and those on earth. What I have come to believe is that the Mass is anything but ordinary. The Mass is an extraordinary gathering not just of persons around the world from different languages and cultures, but a unity of persons and angelic hosts spanning time and era, life and death.

Now when I attend Mass, whether at my home parish or elsewhere around the world, I take a moment to appreciate and acknowledge the ways the heavenly worship is part of my earthly worship. Instead of only looking around at the other parishioners, I remember loved ones who have gone before me, and I praise and thank God while at Mass as they do at every moment in heaven, imagining they are sitting beside me in the pew. When I listen to the music, I also gaze at the altar or smell the sweet aroma of incense, imagining a choir of angels around the priest at the table of the Lord. These small adjustments help me to view Mass not only as something earthly but also as something deeply and profoundly heavenly.

August 9, 2024
Lessons of Faith and Fortitude: Five Teachings From Saint Lawrence

Photo by LGreen on Bigstock

I’m not sure where I first heard the story of Saint Lawrence’s martyrdom, but it has always resonated with me. Amidst all the theology and seriousness surrounding our Catholic faith, Saint Lawrence’s courage and wit in the face of dire circumstances offer valuable lessons for us all.

This second-century saint’s life, most of which was lost to antiquity, continues to resonate with believers today. The story of Saint Lawrence’s martyrdom can provide us with humor, charity, and sacrifice, offering valuable lessons. Let’s delve into the life of Saint Lawrence, exploring five things to learn from his remarkable journey.

Charity beyond wealth

Perhaps the most renowned anecdote from Saint Lawrence’s life revolves around his act of charity during the tumultuous reign of Roman Emperor Valerian. As one of the seven deacons of Rome, Lawrence was entrusted with the Church’s treasures. However, when confronted by Roman authorities demanding the surrender of these riches, he astounded them with an act of selflessness. Instead of relinquishing the material wealth, Lawrence distributed it among the poor, widows, and orphans, proclaiming that these people were the true treasures of the Church.

In a world where materialism often reigns supreme, Saint Lawrence’s actions offer a poignant reminder of the importance of charity and compassion. His legacy encourages us to look beyond our possessions and share our resources with those in need. True wealth lies not in material belongings, but in the warmth of human connection fostered through acts of love and generosity.

RELATED: How St. Teresa of Avila Helped Me Overcome the Fear of Failure

The unyielding spirit of faith

Throughout his life, Saint Lawrence epitomized an unyielding spirit of faith, even in the face of dire circumstances. When commanded to renounce his beliefs under pain of death, he stood firm, refusing to abandon his Christian principles. This unwavering commitment to his faith resulted in his arrest and subsequent martyrdom. His execution by being roasted alive on a gridiron remains one of the most harrowing yet poignant testimonies to his steadfast faith.

In an era where religious tolerance is often tested and religious persecution persists in some parts of the world, the example of Saint Lawrence resonates deeply. His courage inspires us to embrace our beliefs and convictions with resolute determination, regardless of the consequences.

Humor amidst adversity

Despite the grave situation he faced, Saint Lawrence displayed an unexpected and brave sense of humor as he was led to his execution by burning. Tradition holds that he humorously remarked to his executioners, “Turn me over, I’m done on this side!”, refusing to be cowed by the darkness surrounding him. This part of Saint Lawrence’s story also demonstrates the humor of the Catholic Church as Saint Lawrence is the patron saint of chefs.

Saint Lawrence’s humor offers a powerful lesson in resilience. It reminds us that laughter can be a source of strength, even amidst the darkest moments. By finding joy in the face of adversity, we can better navigate life’s challenges with courage and hope.

A spirit of service

As one of the seven deacons of Rome, Saint Lawrence was dedicated to serving the Christian community and assisting the pope in various capacities. His life of service exemplifies the Christian ethos of caring for others, especially the marginalized and vulnerable. Through his ministry, Lawrence demonstrated that true greatness lies not in self-serving pursuits but in humbly dedicating oneself to the betterment of others.

For example, Lawrence was known for his work with the destitute and his efforts to aid those who were suffering, often going out of his way to provide for the needs of the poor and the sick.

In our busy days, where ambition often overshadows compassion, Saint Lawrence’s emphasis on service serves as a poignant reminder to prioritize the needs of others. By embracing the call to service, we can find fulfillment and purpose beyond personal achievements.

RELATED: Paying the Ultimate Price: What Martyrs Can Teach Us About Sacrifices for Faith

Martyrdom as a testament of faith

Saint Lawrence’s martyrdom remains an enduring testament to his unwavering faith and commitment to his beliefs. His readiness to embrace death rather than betray his principles demonstrates the immense strength and conviction of his faith.

Though few may be called upon to make such a dramatic sacrifice, Saint Lawrence’s martyrdom reminds us to remain steadfast in our beliefs, even when the world challenges our convictions. In a society that often values conformity over authenticity, his courage in the face of death serves as a powerful reminder to stand true to ourselves and our beliefs.

The life of Saint Lawrence of Rome has always been a timeless source of inspiration for me, offering profound insights that resonate deeply in my own journey. His acts of charity, unwavering faith, and remarkable humor illuminate a path toward greater compassion, courage, and service.

From Saint Lawrence, I have learned the importance of standing firm in my beliefs, and finding strength in humor during tough times.

As I contemplate his legacy, I strive to embrace these virtues in my own life. May we all find the strength to carry forward the flame of Saint Lawrence’s indomitable spirit, living with the same compassion, courage, and joyful resilience that he exemplified. By doing so, we ensure that his remarkable spirit continues to inspire generations to come.

August 7, 2024
‘Inside Out 2’ and the Journey of Self-Acceptance and Reconciliation

“Inside Out 2” (Courtesy of Walt Disney Pictures)

As a rising kindergartener, my 5-year-old feels our summer schedule should encompass all things big-kid-related. One of her ideas for a rite of passage: movie theaters. I was hesitant at first, but after she saw a trailer for “Inside Out 2,” there was no stopping the flood of requests to see the new movie.

We attended a sensory-friendly screening where the lights are merely dimmed and the volume plays a tad softer. Overall, it was a success. My 2-and-a-half-year-old lost interest midway through, but discovered the joys of popcorn and was placated, while my big kid was utterly mesmerized.

RELATED: A Good Dog: How ‘Bluey’ Inspires Goodness for the Whole Family

For those unfamiliar with the “Inside Out” movies, the plots center on the Emotions that reside in our heads: Joy, Sadness, Fear, Anger, and Envy. These Emotions control the console of our feelings while creating and storing memories. The mind in which most of the plot’s action takes place belongs to Riley, a lovable young lady who is 11 in the first movie and 13 in the sequel. The first film is a favorite at our house and focuses on the important roles of both Joy and Sadness in our life and growth.

The writers of Pixar’s “Inside Out 2” succeeded again in crafting a film that not only appeals to youngsters, but also speaks with a nuanced wisdom to tweens, teens, and adults. While the new emotions in Riley’s head, led by Anxiety, have received a great deal of attention, an aspect of the movie that fascinated me was the Belief System.

The Belief System is a curated set of memories that create Riley’s continually forming Sense of Self. At the start of “Inside Out 2,” the audience witnesses Joy carefully choosing good memories to add to Riley’s Belief System; thereby forming a string of light that fuels and develops the Sense of Self. Joy also creates a launching device for all painful or embarrassing memories; they are sent flying to the back of the mind. The emotions express pride in Riley’s Sense of Self as it intones beliefs like “I am a good person” and “I am a good friend.” Then, puberty begins and Anxiety usurps the console of Emotions.

Anxiety destroys Riley’s Sense of Self and begins to form a new Sense of Self based on anxious beliefs; this new Belief System crackles and pops while shining a scalding orange. Riley acts out of character, ignoring her friends in favor of popularity, lying for clout, and appearing altogether lost internally. The Emotions are faced with a tough choice as they struggle to fight Anxiety and restore Riley’s Sense of Self: Do they release the bad memories to influence the Belief System in order to incorporate the good ones as well?

RELATED: Spiritual Streaming: 5 Faith-Themed Films for Your Next Movie Night

The Emotions realize that clinging to the Belief that we are all good, without the nuance of our flaws, isn’t a realistic or healthy way to live. The floodgate of memories is unleashed and Riley copes with the influx of new threads to her Belief System: She is a good person, but she makes mistakes and bad choices. Riley doesn’t accept her faults, but instead acknowledges them, and attempts to repair the damage she’s done. She finds a way to grow and move forward with a more holistic view of who she is.

As I sat in the theater with my daughters cuddled on either side of me, I couldn’t help but think about how we as Christians take this idea of acknowledging our faults to an even more fulfilling conclusion.

Rather than being left with the emotions in our head waging war against our poor choices and their effects on our Sense of Self, we are offered a beautiful example of love and forgiveness through God’s offer of Reconciliation. When we bring our whole selves, mistakes and all, vulnerably before God, He offers us grace. We are reminded in Romans 5:8 that, “God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” Our faults do not have to become entrenched in our Sense of Self; we recognize our sinfulness and we bring it to him who loves us nonetheless.

When we acknowledge before God our failings, mistakes, and sins, we move into a relationship of love; for as C.S. Lewis writes “to love at all is to be vulnerable.” This vulnerability and willingness to confess our sins before God allows us to accept his love and grace. As Riley has to come to understand her Sense of Self as a fluctuating core, capable of good and bad choices, we too have the chance to humbly admit our failures and embrace our deep need for God.

LISTEN: Co-Creator of ‘Blue’s Clues’ and ‘Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood’ Offers Life Lessons for All Ages

My 5-year-old tends to be hard on herself when she makes a mistake – a reaction I understand all too well. We often talk through how a poor choice does not indicate that you are a mean or bad person; in fact, feeling regret and disappointment in your actions shows that you know what is right, good, and true. The key is to make amends for our bad decisions. I appreciated how the movie showed Riley’s realization of her unkind behavior towards her friends, and her willingness to apologize and patiently build back their trust. When Riley makes amends with the friends whom she has hurt, she has to admit that she was wrong, but she moves towards a wholeness within herself.

Reconciliation restores not only our relationship with God, but also our relationship with ourselves. Acknowledging our need for God’s grace creates an opportunity for our Sense of Self to broaden from internal musings to external appreciation for what God tells us about ourselves. He reminds us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139), we are precious, honored, (Isaiah 43), chosen (Ephesians 1), created in God’s own image (Genesis 1:27), forgiven (1 John 1:9), and loved (Romans 8:38). When our Sense of Self wavers, as “Inside Out 2” reminds us it is prone to do, we can lean back on the truth of what God tells us about ourselves.

I think the concept that our feelings about ourselves will change over time is an important one for both young and mature audiences. There are days of soaring pride and dark disappointment. However, when our Sense of Self relies not on our own fluctuating emotions, but on the steady promises of God, we can rest in the peace of his gaze. This is my hope and prayer for my girls, that movies like “Inside Out 2” remind them that everyone struggles with identity and belonging, yet their worth is not measured by feelings or validation from their peers. Their significance and Sense of Self is guaranteed and beautifully crafted by a God who loves them and welcomes them with open arms.

August 2, 2024
How Finding a Spiritual Director Changed My Life

“Who do you imagine as a spiritual director?” Carla, the coordinator at my local Ignatian Spirituality Center asked. I started to laugh as the image of Don Porter, the actor who played Sally Field’s father on the television show, “Gidget” flashed in my mind. Carla’s mission was to find a spiritual director match for me among the resource pool the Center maintains.

“Dr. Lawrence from the show ‘Gidget.’” I answered. On the show, Dr. Lawrence was an English professor who found his daughter’s antics adorable, and he always had a kind word for her when she got herself into trouble. “No small task — but find me someone like him,” I joked.

But Carla knew that as much as this detail seemed silly, it was telling of the type of spiritual director I was looking for.

A spiritual director is someone you can talk to about your experience with God. They are there to support you, guide you, and help you see where God is working in your life. Carla asked me about my spiritual background and what nourished my own faith journey. It was through this conversation that we realized I was looking for someone intellectual and compassionate, someone who wouldn’t be intimidated by my sometimes brassy manner. Yes, someone like Dr. Lawrence.

RELATED: A Guide to Spiritual Direction

The next week, I received an email from Carla with a possible match. Mark was a deacon from a neighboring parish and would meet with me to see if we were a good fit for one another.

When we met, I immediately noticed Mark’s boisterous, yet warm, manner. He welcomed me as if I was a long-lost niece and offered me tea. Within minutes, Mark told me he was New Yorker, a perfect match for my East L.A. brass, and as I started to tell him about my spiritual background, he quoted Church Fathers and writers as if they were dear friends.

I told Mark I had pursued spiritual direction because I wanted more of God in my life. I had felt disconnected, not just from God, but from others in my life, and I lacked focus in my work and relationships. I wanted to feel God’s presence in an ordinary day, as I believed all the rest would fall in line when I knew God was there.

“The time we spend together is just for you, to feel supported and for me to help you find God,” Mark said.

RELATED: Father Dave Visits His Spiritual Director

He asked about my prayer life. How did I pray? What did I pray about? How did I feel connected to God? Was it mostly through Mass or could I remember times I felt God in other places? As I answered, it felt wonderful to share these precious things with someone else.

As we wrapped up our meeting, Mark said to me, “Pray the Examen,” giving me the next step for making a connection with God. “You’ll see where he’s been all along.”

I added the Examen to my nightly routine. By looking over my day with gratitude, I began to see all the ways in which I connect with God — through music I play on my stereo (or even in the car), art in museums or magazines, conversations with strangers and friends, hikes in the forest near my house, and sometimes, even as I fold laundry. I realized I had so many places to look for and meet God. And after sharing these revelations with Mark, I started to view these activities as moments of worship.

“Now, try to notice God in the moment, instead of only in the reflection of the day,” Mark advised. I will, in fits and starts, as any practice takes just that, practice. When I do, I stop and savor these moments of God’s presence.

Talking to Mark is akin to daydreaming about God. I imagine where I’d like to spend time with God like I would if my old friend was coming in from out of town. I might take them for a walk to Lake Washington or share a favorite cafe or an art exhibit. What would I want to tell an old friend about? What struggles or joys would I share? Something magical happens when we daydream about God with another believer. We conjure God up. And I begin to notice that God is present with Mark and me as if he heard us talking about our dear friend.

Originally published April 30th, 2018.

July 29, 2024
The Camino de Santiago: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

The scallop shell, a symbol of the Camino, is found attached to the backpacks of most pilgrims. (Photo courtesy of the author)

“Hiking on the Camino can become addictive,” a pilgrim on the Camino de Santiago told a small group of us while we were having dinner together in an albergue (pilgrim inn) a few years ago. His words proved prophetic – I have done three Caminos and counting! I began my third pilgrimage on the Caminho Portugués in October 2023. I had missed the sound of my hiking poles touching the ground, the meeting up with other pilgrims as well as time alone for quiet reflection, and the visits to chapels, churches, and cathedrals along the way, but mostly I missed the feeling of just being on the Camino as so many others have done before.

Starting out on The Portuguese Way

The Caminho Portugués starts in Lisbon and continues to Porto, where the majority of pilgrims begin their journey. I headed out from there in October 2023, intending to go as far as I could depending on weather. The Caminho Portugués was my shortest hike, but no less meaningful than the other Caminos I have traveled. Having no set time limit, I lingered where I chose, taking time to simply enjoy being where I was, once again on the Pilgrim Way. Like so many other pilgrims, I visited the Igreja de Carmo, the 18th-century baroque church famous for its stunning blue murals on the exterior walls, among other historic places.

RELATED: My Virtual Camino: Celebrating the Feast of St. James in My Own Backyard

The gift of humanity

About a week into my Portuguese Camino hike in the village of Tamelo, I was waiting for the albergue to open. A Belgian woman in her 40s sat across from me outside and told me that her 43-year-old athletic, healthy husband had died of esophageal cancer two years before. Her depression became so severe that she had to stop working. Her son, who had hiked the Portuguese Camino as a way of healing, suggested she do the same.

Sharing such stories with complete strangers is not unusual on the Camino. It seems to make us lower our defenses and laughter, love, caring, and sharing become the norm. Such conversations felt like gifts to me, gifts of people’s humanity and kindness.

The taxi angel

Not long after that conversation, the rain began overnight. Lacking the heartiness of some pilgrims, I found that hiking in the rain under a plastic poncho, which caused uncomfortably damp clothes, made it time for me to cheat a little. But it was Sunday in rural Portugal and no buses were running, so I called a taxi, using my Spanish in Portugal to explain where I was and where I wanted to go.

“Dez minutos,’’ I was told. Ten minutes. Ten minutes turned into 30. I called again. “Dos minutos,” I was told, two minutes, and right at two minutes, a well-worn black car pulled into the bus stop. I placed my small bag in the trunk, which was full of odds and ends and jumper cables. Strange that this was a taxi, I thought, but this was rural Portugal on a Sunday morning. The driver went north for about 20 minutes and then stopped at another rural bus stop.

RELATED: Everyone Walks Their Own Camino

A Portuguese cyclist who spoke good English came by. I told him of my predicament, that I was trying to get to Punto do Lima. The driver then explained to the cyclist that he was, in fact, not a taxi driver but he could see I needed help, so he was just giving me a lift.

Just then, two Canadian hikers whom I had run into now and then on the Camino literally came out of the woods. When I explained what had happened, we all laughed, and then one of the hikers, Ken, said to me, “The Camino always gives.” The man in the black car was my taxi angel, I realized, another gift from the camino. The cyclist called a real taxi, I gave a very happy “Obrigado” (thank you) to the car angel, and the taxi driver took me to an albergue in Punto do Lima, where I spent a dry and comfortable night.

Arrival in Santiago de Compostela

The hand of a pilgrim hugging the statue of Saint James in the Cathedral of Compostela. (Photo courtesy of the author)

After hiking for 10 days, I arrived in Santiago de Compostela and seeing the Cathedral of Saint James again was no less enthralling. I got in line to hug the statue of Saint James, a pilgrim tradition, and said a prayer of thanks for all of it. I received Communion with many other pilgrims from around the world. Seeing their faces with their looks of wonder, happiness, belief, disbelief – I don’t know which word best describes the look on their faces, so maybe all of them will have to do.

And then another gift — seeing the botafumeiro, the incense burner, so large and heavy that five priests are needed to lift it above the chancel and swing it, a sight which happens only infrequently. I looked in wonder and said another silent prayer of thanks.

A camino full of grace

Just a few months before my hike, my closest friend from high school passed away. I lit a candle for her before the altar of Saint James. That same night I dreamt about her as she was when we were growing up together. In the dream, we both knew she was still ill, but that dream was like having one more chance to see her well and laughing. Maybe that dream was yet another gift.

I will miss the pilgrims I met in Tamelo and others along the way, all on a pilgrimage for their own reasons so willingly shared. Friendship and affection grew easily among us, and it is doubtful I’ll ever see them again, but the Camino is like that. Angels come and go. “How many Caminos have you done?” is a familiar question among us pilgrims. This was my third Camino, but I’m sure there will be a fourth, and fifth – with arms open to receive the Camino’s grace.

July 24, 2024
Faith and Fitness: 3 Spiritual Lessons I Learned From CrossFit

The author, at her CrossFit gym, taking a well-deserved water break.

When I came to my first CrossFit class three years ago, I arrived to prove to my sister how much I would not enjoy it. As someone who identified as “not a gym person,” I could not lift an empty barbell, did not know how to use a rowing machine, and could not do one push-up (even from my knees). Today, I can lift (power clean) 125 pounds, use the rower like I know how to walk, and perform 15 regular pushups. And I really have no clue how this happened. The physical gains in CrossFit have been immense because of the methodology. And, the more I think about it, this methodology very naturally transfers to spiritual life. Here are three spiritual lessons I’ve garnered from my CrossFit experience.

RELATED: Running the Path of Faith: What I Learned From Incorporating Spirituality into My Exercise Routine

Your spiritual fitness regimen can be programmed to include a variety of repetitive prayer practices

In CrossFit, workouts are programmed by the staff. So when you arrive at the gym, your workout will be detailed on the whiteboard, and the movements (for example push-ups, pull-ups, deadlifts, box jumps, etc.) are chosen for you based on a system that repeats certain movements in a cycle to holistically build your overall fitness. This varied structure keeps me engaged and lowers the risk of injury. Similarly, I benefit from discipline in the spiritual life but need to vary my prayer practices. When I expect myself to stay statically consistent (i.e. “I’m going to pray the Examen every night forever!”) I end up giving it up when I skip one night. Instead, I make the goals shorter and vary them. (“This week I’m going to try centering prayer for 10 min/day at lunch.”)

RELATED: A Prayer for Every Mile: How My Prayer Bracelet Helped Me Finish a Half Marathon

All prayer practices are infinitely scalable according to your spiritual fitness

All of the movements in a CrossFit workout can be scaled. Every movement has degrees of difficulty according to the athlete’s body on the particular day they’re showing up. If the workout calls for “pull-ups” and you can’t even hang from a bar, a scaled option includes pulling yourself up using gymnastics rings, or pulling a light dumbbell to your chest as you angle your body forward. Similarly with spiritual practices, sometimes you have to scale according to your bandwidth and time or other factors. My prescribed 10 minutes of centering prayer could be scaled to three minutes if I’m running late for work or maxed out at the end of the day. My nightly Examen could be scaled to lighting a candle and saying a couple of gratitude prayers. The point of scaling is to allow myself to build consistency without burning out.

RELATED: Biking and Praying: How a 7-Day Ride Reenergized My Faith

Community carries you

If I show up to the gym, I know the workout will be completed because everyone will be doing it and I’m a part of the whole moving organism. My body will just kind of kick into gear even if my mind is thinking of other things— at some point, something shifts and I’m entirely present. Calories have been burned, and the workout counts even if I did not consciously decide to make each movement happen. Similarly, when I show up for Mass, it is likely that I might not be “in the mood” to go when the time comes around, but good old obligation and being witnessed in my practice subconsciously motivates me. And, even if I’m “going through the motions”— standing, kneeling, sitting, saying repetitive prayers—my mind could be elsewhere but the prayers still “count.”

RELATED: 6 Bible Passages for Runners

CrossFit spirituality is one of consistent effort in community with adjustments according to your daily need. Over time, the method begins to take, and you will find yourself on a whole new level of spiritual fitness you never knew possible.

Originally published August 18, 2023.

July 19, 2024
What Is Grace? Three Truths That Help Us Understand God’s Favor

Shortly after being ordained a deacon, I was asked by my pastor to put together a presentation on the sacraments. Working my way through the task, I came to a point where I needed to produce a slide on what it is that the sacraments provide. That gift, in special abundance, is of course God’s amazing and life-giving grace.

At that moment, I froze. Had I looked in a mirror, I’m certain I would have seen myself looking like a deer in headlights. Of course, I knew that grace is good. If I were to ask just about anyone if they wanted a bountiful helping of God’s grace, that answer would be in the high affirmative. That said, I found myself at a loss as to how to explain what grace is. Grace seemed to be one of those things that is easier to internalize than it is to explain.

LISTEN: Is Mercy Like Grace?

Sure, had I been asked at that time by a parishioner what grace was, I’m confident that I would have been able to tap dance my way to some kind of answer. I likely would’ve responded with something like: It is a gift from God. It is good and will make us better disciples. It will make us happier humans. But I knew that this response was sub-par. There had to be a better way to describe what grace truly is.

Desiring not to ever poorly shuffle my way through an explanation of something so important, I set out on a mission to come up with a succinct and relatable description of God’s grace.

After analyzing the many definitions of the various types of grace, (Sanctifying, Actual, Sacramental, etc), I came up even more deer-dazed than when I started. But then, I found it, a best-in-class explanation of grace. Confidence immediately replaced my grace-related trepidation. Before me was something that I not only understood, but also something that I could easily share with others.

It came from the “Catechism of the Catholic Church,” paragraph 1996, and reads,

Grace is favor, the free and undeserved help that God gives us to respond to his call to become children of God, adoptive sons, partakers of the Divine Nature and of eternal life.

This short, yet comprehensive definition breaks down into three grace-related truths:

1. Grace is free and undeserved

“Grace is favor, the free and undeserved help God gives us…” Short and sweet, what this tells us is that although we don’t deserve this great gift of grace, God desires to pour it out on us. All we have to do is recognize, accept, and participate within it. Perhaps the greatest example of this is recognizing and believing in Christ’s presence in the Eucharist and participating in it at the altar of the Mass.

2. Grace contains a call and a response

Of all three components of this definition, the “help that God gives us to respond to his call” is the one that housed my personal “light-bulb” moment in understanding the gift of grace. Notice that there are two ingredients baked into this part of grace; first there is a call, and then, a response.

The call is God’s and it’s always coming our way. I imagine it sounding something like this, “Learn from me the way to life. I love you, come this way!”

I picture this call as a giant radio signal that God, since the beginning of time, has been diffusing throughout the ends of the earth. Trying to jam this signal, is the world and the elements of evil, and they are good at it.

WATCH: Sacraments 201: The Eucharist

For many of us, that signal gets increasingly difficult to hear. It becomes replaced by worldly distractions that seek to steal from us God’s intended gift of happiness. For me, the most effective way to blast through the noise that seeks to block God’s call is to attend Mass frequently. There is indeed something happening at the Mass, specifically in the Sacrament of Holy Communion, that keeps me hungering not only for the Mass, but for more time with he who is the Mass.

Grace is the force that helps us to respond to God’s perpetual signal, his loving call. Suddenly, grace makes perfect sense! Grace gives us the ability to hear and then respond to God’s call!

But understand this about grace; it takes two to tango. To receive its maximal benefit, we must be active participants within it. As the Apostle James wrote, “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.”

3. Grace calls us to become partakers of the divine nature and of the eternal life

When we respond to God’s call we become, “adoptive sons, partakers of the Divine Nature and eternal life.” This relates back to the Mass where we “partake” in Christ’s very essence. While God delivers grace in many ways, grace nears its zenith during the Mass, and most essentially within the Sacrament of the Eucharist.

Having discovered a definition that helped me put a pin in my presentation on the sacraments was a minor find relative to where it has led me. The understanding of the interrelationship and inseparability of grace and the Eucharist has set me on a mission to share the truth of both. What’s often missing in one’s understanding of the Eucharist is what the gifted benefit of grace really is, and how that grace stands ready to lead us all on a path towards happiness and holiness.

Originally published July 12, 2022.

July 17, 2024
3 Ways to Practice the Art of Listening

Photo courtesy of Cathopic

Anyone who knows me well can tell you that I’m a very opinionated person. While I pride myself on being open to considering different points of view, the truth is, I still struggle mightily with listening to other people. However, I was recently reading the book by Mother Mary Francis, P.C.C., “But I Have Called You Friends: Reflections on the Art of Christian Friendship” and I came across the following passage, which made an immediate impression on me:

“The person of intelligently strong convictions is ready to have them modified, expanded, or changed according to the counterevidence presented. Any persons of opposite convictions are friends to be listened to, not enemies to be warded off.”

As I read and reread that paragraph several times, I became decidedly uncomfortable. I began to ponder how often my convictions have gotten in the way of treating people with charity, even family members. My parents enjoy watching cable news. I do not. “Hot button” political issues tend to get my hackles up, so if I’m in the room when the talking heads happen to be on the TV, arguments too often break out. The question of student loan forgiveness, for example, has provoked more than a few heated exchanges. My immediate impulse when contradicted, is to get defensive or go on a counterattack.

RELATED: Two Ears and One Mouth: Why We Should Listen More Than We Talk

In our 21st-century outrage culture, the art of listening is so important but is rarely practiced. Sadly, none of us is immune to the temptation to scapegoat people, whether family members or total strangers. It can be too easy for me to label people who don’t share my political convictions, religious beliefs, or cultural presuppositions as “enemies.” When I fail to treat the opinions of others with respect, empathy is quickly lost.

There’s nothing wrong with holding strong convictions or defending your principles. Respectful listening doesn’t mean that you remain passive or completely disengage from a debate. Authentic dialogue is a form of active listening. True respectful conversation can be learned by doing it, through patient practice. I’ve found three simple and practical strategies that have been immensely helpful in keeping me mindful of my biases and of the respect owed to those who don’t share my opinions.

LISTEN: How to Have a Crucial Conversation

1. Be present

The first step in learning to listen is to eliminate distractions and simply be present. I can’t count how many times I’ve failed to be truly present in a conversation or debate. We’re all addicted to our smartphones these days, and when someone else is speaking, I can be sorely tempted to take out my phone and scroll through my social media feed or check my email. Not only is this an incredibly rude thing to do, but also I’m robbing myself of the chance to learn — to truly understand a different perspective from my own.

2. Don’t interrupt

“A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing personal opinion” (Proverbs 18:2). Ouch! Personally, this biblical one-liner hits a little too close to home. I’m a self-identified chatterbox and I know quite well that I have a bad habit of interrupting during conversations, trying to finish other people’s sentences or jumping in early with my counterarguments. This is disrespectful and a form of pride — many of us like to hear ourselves talk! Respectful silence shows that you value your discussion partner and are truly interested in what they have to say.

3. Ask questions

Unless you ask questions, you’re not making enough of an effort to understand someone else’s position. If someone puts forth an argument or an assertion that makes my blood boil, my habitual reaction is to go on the attack. But when I began to slow down and ask questions (“Why do you believe that?” or “Could you please tell me more about your feelings on this?”) I found it easier to keep my emotions in check. I’ve even tried to rephrase my counterarguments in the form of questions. (“Have you considered this perspective?”) This kind of measured response signals respect for the opposing point of view.

RELATED: Learning and Listening: Identifying My Blind Spots and Committing to Growth

True understanding

If, while the other person is speaking, you’re preoccupied with coming up with a witty rejoinder, or if you start interrupting, or if you retaliate without asking any questions, then you’re not making the effort to listen or cultivate genuine mutual understanding. Listening to understand rather than to respond is difficult, but it’s worth it. The epistle of St. James admonishes Christians to remain modest and restrained in speech: “You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19).

Honestly, I’m still a work in progress when it comes to keeping my temper during intense discussions. But I have begun to notice changes for the better. My family in particular, have commended me for the fact that I now make a point of keeping my cell phone in my pocket during conversations. They’ve noticed that I interrupt less and ask more questions. Our talks about current events have become more engaging and mutually fruitful, as we try to understand one another rather than simply “win” an argument.

Also, as I’ve made an effort to understand perspectives other than my own, my worldview has started to become less cramped and insular. I’ve learned to stop labeling people of different beliefs as “enemies” (or worse “sinners”) whose views can be easily discounted. After all, they are fellow children of God with infinite dignity who should be respected and loved.

As the scribe correctly responds in Mark’s Gospel, “‘to love [God] with all your heart, with all your understanding, with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself’ is worth more than all burnt offerings and sacrifices” (Mark 12:33).

July 15, 2024
A Resurrection From Cynicism: Learning to See Myself With God’s Eyes

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

“A cup filled with vinegar can’t spill honey.” I don’t remember how I came across the saying, but despite being filled with wisdom, the phrase has always made me feel uneasy about myself. I go to church, I volunteer, I teach children with disabilities, I’m kind and caring… but underneath all that, I can sense a sour smell of vinegar, of bitterness and cynicism…and it shows. And it’s painful.

I get annoyed when a handful of us are working hard in the church kitchen while the other 150 people from the congregation just turn up to enjoy the meal. No one is rushing to help. Sure, I think to myself, it’s all about ‘give and take’ for us Christians…as long as I give and you take. I get tired of parents who complain about their children’s behavior at home and blame teachers (like me) for failing to make their child achieve in school. The toxic thoughts run through my head, Perhaps, you could start introducing some boundaries at home…then we’ll talk!

Pray for Us Complainers: Turning Our Words From Protest to Praise

I read the Bible and ask God to heal my heart and renew my mind, remove the darkness and cynicism…but it just won’t go away. So I try a different strategy. I say to myself, come on, you’ve got to look at yourself through the eyes of God. You’ve got to see yourself the way He sees you. But, how does He see me?

***

I teach in a special elementary school for children with severe learning difficulties. The other day, I asked a boy in my class to count all the children (four) and all the adults (three) in class. His math was different from mine. He ended up with two grown-ups and five children. He pointed at one of the teaching assistants and said, “One.” He pointed at the other one and said, “Two.” Then he stopped. I kept pointing at myself to encourage him to continue counting. The boy scrutinized my face for a couple more seconds, and gave out a firm “no.” As far as he was concerned, I didn’t count as a grown-up.

At first, I was embarrassed. There were two other members of staff there, and I was suddenly exposed as a fraud! I pretend to be an experienced professional, a grown-up. Is this really how I appear to other people?! Yet, his observations were a precious gift.

RELATED: Praying for Patience: What I’ve Learned From God’s Time vs. My Own

The cynical part of me is critical of other people’s behavior and choices; it can be furious, angry, impatient and frustrated. It savors every depressing headline on the front page of a national newspaper. It moans and complains. This dark and gloomy “me” is too thick-skinned to go through the narrow gate to enter the kingdom. But that’s not the real me. The real me — the silly, playful, joyful me — meets the requirements. The boy confirmed it! In fact, we all qualify.

The real me makes funny noises, dances around the classroom, loves little people, loves life. My heart is not filled with vinegar. It’s full of sweet childhood innocence, and when it spills, it turns my surroundings into a land of milk and honey. It can never be taken away from me or get lost.

God is faithful and does respond to my unique needs and cries for help. When I read the Bible, I don’t actually get messages like, “Be good” or “Try harder.” The lines and verses that always stand out for me personally are those linked to attention, focus and concentration. Be watchful, be on guard, stay alert, stay awake.

The cynical mind isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It may come from a place of knowledge and deeper awareness of the inequality and desperate need in the world. I can keep that. What I don’t want is to indulge in celebrating my own (or the world’s) shortcomings and faults. I want to be alert. Keep my eyes on what is good, true, and beautiful. Have faith like a child. Avoid getting carried away into the depths of cynicism and despair. And God has always showered me with lovely things and sweet moments to help me stay awake to the beauty of his creation.

Originally published June 4, 2020.

July 8, 2024